Mommy's funeral came and went. I knew I'd leave angry. First I've got Brad flirting with me, putting his arms around my waist and hugging me and saying how we have to be there for Ben since he means so much to the both of us, yak, yak, yak... Then I see the little asshole holding hands with Ben's other ex named Lauren (is that weird or what?) during the funeral service. I didn't say anything to Ben about it, he has enough issues to deal with. Besides, I promised him I wouldn't start any trouble, since he knows how much I can't stand his ex-girlfriend. (What can I say? Shallow, alcoholic sluts annoy me, and it isn't fair that I had to suffer throughout my relationship with Ben because she cheated on him four years ago.) And while I shouldn't have expected it, hardly anyone acknowledged the relationship between me and Mommy. I shouldn't care, but it does hurt me just a little.

Anyway, we celebrated a small yet very lovely Christmas Eve. I promised I'd tell what everybody got, so here goes:

Daddy- Dune, Pink Floyd: Relics and Brian Eno: Another Green World on CD, and Mandy ^_^

Mandy- the complete libretto of Wagner's The Ring of the Nebulung in English and German, all of Daddy's army medals and decoratons, and Daddy ^_^

La (that would be me)- Mandy's big book about the musical "Rent," Daddy's resin statue of the eight Chinese gods riding in a dragon boat, some various patches and pins, and Daddy's complete organic chem set

Brian wasn't with us for Christmas so I don't know what all of his presents are yet, but I got him A Hobbit's Journal, a blank book filled with drawings of LOTR characters.

Our tree this year is fairly small, decorated with some tiny white lights, some fake sprigs of holly and berries that the Wicked Witch (my step-mother) bought and never used, and the golden sunflakes Daddy and I got when I was little because they reminded us of the Pink Floyd song "Granchester Meadows." Our stockings hang on the fireplace that doesn't work, with nothing in them. Deep drifts of snow lie outside our windows. It has been the most pleasant Christmas I can recall, except for the fact that Brian wasn't with us. Daddy may be picking him up from his mother's once the snow clears up a little.

The Wicked Witch told Daddy on the phone on Christmas Eve not to bring "the little girl" (meaning Mandy) with him when he picks up Joey because she doesn't want her child exposed to an adulteress. (I suppose it's okay if the child is raised by a hypocrital, spiteful liar.) In response, we laughed and ate sand tarts in the shape of witches on broomsticks, made especially to look like her.

Last night I did yoga before bed and I slept like a baby. I'm thinking of making a regular routine out of it. I'm also making an honest attempt to cut down on junk and high cholesterol stuff because lately I feel kind of blah and I think I need to clean all that stuff out of my system. So, drinking lots of water and getting good wholesome food into my system, trying to resist the urge to make smores. Well, maybe a marshmallow or two wouldn't hurt...

"All around me golden sunflakes settle on the ground." -Pink Floyd

"Do a little dance!"

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